This post in particular is for all of the young adults who, like me, have no idea what they are doing with their life.
So first things first, ya'll should know that I am the most plan oriented person in the world. Like seriously. I make color-coded checklists for everything from homework to brushing my teeth. On top of that, I thrive in a school environment and I love the act of learning and doing well academically. With that in mind, you would think that I have a solid plan for my life. Well ya wrong, son. That, unfortunately, is not the case. In fact, it makes it even harder because now I have to decide between a lot of things that I'm good at, but not anything that I'm particularly passionate about. This is a very common state of mind for a lot high school and college-age students in similar positions. Not to mention, I'm surrounded by a group of friends who know exactly what and who they're going to be. A vet, a beautician, a software programmer, a physical therapist... And I've only done two college tours. But in America, students are expected to know what they want to pursue and come up with more money than God to support these dreams by the time they're only eighteen years old. And it's not even that I'm afraid of failing in whatever field I choose (because the need for excellence is in my nature) it's that I'm afraid of regret. I'm afraid I'm going to regret choosing one thing over another, or changing a major, or sacrificing $100,000 for a piece of paper with my name on it. Okay so there's my deepest fear broadcasted on the internet... My point is that even though I don't know where I'm going or what I'm doing in the next two years of my life, it's going to be okay. Here is a little piece of advice for you soon to be high school graduates or even college freshies: Just get through today. We worry a lot about our futures but we really don't know what other opportunities will arise or what passions we will find. And if you wake up in five years and don't like what you've become? Well, you'll only be about 23. That's plenty of time to turn it around. Some time back, I came up with a coping mechanism of sorts and called it "my ideal." It's basically a scenario in which everything is as perfect as a Hallmark Movie life. In this universe, I'm about twenty-four and I'm working as an executive assistant for a big CEO of some kind of company. I see myself living alone in a beautiful apartment (which, in my brain, I know is way more expensive than I could ever afford) with my cat. I see various versions of this scene, too. Sometimes I like to pretend I get a really late night night phone call and I have to go to the office and work until 6:00am so that I can finish fifteen executive summaries. Sometimes I'll see myself waking up at 5:00 in the mooring and sitting on my windowsill overlooking the city with my cat on my lap. In my head, I know that this is extremely unrealistic because at some point I'll probably be in some kind of relationship and there is really no such this as an executive assistant that is twenty-four years old and by this point my cat will probably be dead, but it helps. I don't really know the psychology behind why imagining myself in an unattainable dreamland is comforting. The realist inside me says that's about one in a million, but the optimist says that there's still that chance it might happen. I think that just having an idea, even if it's as crazy as mine, is a good place to start. You don't even have to pursue it. I might become an anesthesiologist for all I know, but it's good to be in a positive state of mind and have some kind of goal to work toward. And, at the end of the day, I know it will be okay. I don't no anything except that I know it's going to be okay because I won't let myself settle for anything less than excellence and I refuse to live with regrets. It will be okay because it has to be. I will make it be okay.
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